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Jokes - vtipy v angličtině [ ID: 591 ] - [ Cizí jazyky / Germánské jazyky ]
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MARDUK   06:37:29 14.12.2023
PEPE96 [ 20:09:12 13.12.2023 ]: nekdy se tomu rika "flying knife"
PEPE96   20:09:12 13.12.2023
MARDUK [ 14:05:37 17.10.2023 ]: Co ten kunai?




MARDUK   14:05:37 17.10.2023
IMG:https://files.catbox.moe/mxw748.png
https://files.catbox.moe/mxw748.png
MENAGEN   19:33:20 24.04.2023
It appears that autocorrect has become my worst enema.
VOVA   15:13:51 09.01.2023
The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident in the Bay Of Fundy, Nova Scotia , a man answered his door to find two grim-faced Mounties. "We know it's late, sir, but we have some information about your wife," said one of the Mounties.
"Tell me! Did you find her!?" the husband shouted.

The Mounties looked at each other. One said,

"We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news.. Which do you want to hear first?"

Fearing the worst, the ashen husband said "Give me the bad news first."

The second Mountie said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in the bay." "Oh my God!" exclaimed the husband. Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news?"

The Mountie continued, "When we pulled her up, she had 6 twenty-five pound snow crabs and 12 good-size lobsters clinging to her."

Stunned, the husband demanded, "If that's the good news, what's the great news???"

The Mountie answered, "We're gonna pull her up again tomorrow."
JAROUS   11:36:58 24.12.2021
A cabbage, a tomato, and a nose were having a race. The cabbage was ahead, the nose was running, and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
JAROUS   21:50:42 08.12.2021
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store. I told him, “I don’t think they have what you’re looking for, sir.”
SQUAD   17:19:22 26.11.2021
"Why did communists drink ice tea ?
- Because they hate property."
SLAMPISKO   11:41:31 22.07.2021
Stole this in a club next door

IMG:https://i.chzbgr.com/full/7317895680/hD33051C2/now-thats-a-headline
MENAGEN   19:06:49 12.07.2021
How many grammar nazis does it take to change a lightbulb?
Too.
MENAGEN   06:24:47 04.07.2021
IMG:https://i.chzbgr.com/full/9607159552/h417E4F77
MENAGEN   22:33:34 01.07.2021
Why doesn't sun go to college?
It already has 28 million degrees.
MENAGEN   17:38:08 24.06.2021
History is like a fruit cake.

Full of dates.
OBIWAN   10:01:51 08.05.2021
MENAGEN [ 17:55:50 29.04.2021 ]: připomnělo mi

IMG:https://i.ibb.co/8by0kwr/theknobconnectionricky.png
MENAGEN   17:55:50 29.04.2021
I ordered salad without dressing and got arrested for indecent exposure.
MENAGEN   08:24:02 22.04.2021
IMG:https://i.chzbgr.com/full/9555541248/h441C703E/person-yeah-drink-brake-fluid-but-can-stop-anytime
MENAGEN   09:21:12 10.03.2021
If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.
SLAMPISKO   23:28:31 05.03.2021
MENAGEN [ 19:19:11 04.03.2021 ]:
- "Yoda, are we still going the right way?"
- "Off course, we are!"
MENAGEN   19:25:04 04.03.2021
- What happened to the guy who sued over his missing luggage?
- He lost his case.
MENAGEN   19:19:11 04.03.2021
- Captain, do you know, where we're going?
- Off course!
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